If timing has anything to do with it….
Ok, so tonight was parent visitation at my son’s school. And, I know I said I was going to move this personal stuff to my personal blog but this was too good to pass up.
You know how when someone is openly inviting folks to a “get together” and then they see someone that they don’t really feel good about inviting they get this look on their face…..kind of like they just swallowed a shoe or something?
Well, there were flyers at the front desk tonight. We had to sign in at the front door, take a flyer and “keep moving”. The flyer? An invitation for all parents to attend a workshop at the school on such and such date regarding “how to make homework work”.
And, so, when the assistant principal eyed me placing my hand on the flyer, I could see that “I-just-swallowed-a-shoe” look on her face. I didn’t take a psychic to see the words, “oh no, I hope she don’t show up at that workshop” scrolling across the top of her forehead. It was plain as day.
I don’t know how many of them read this blog but I do know that Walker’s teacher knows about it and “someone” tells her about it. She knows how I feel about homework. So, I’m fairly certain that most everyone in that building knows how I feel about it.
Here’s the thing, we do it, mostly. I mean, we kind of do what she asks. I mean, we do things kind of like she asks. For instance, she sends home these things to read, sometimes we read them, sometimes I let him pick his own books. She sends home sight-words, some times we drill them, sometimes we just read more books. She sends home sheets to practice for Diebels, sometimes we do them and sometimes…we just read more books.
Either way, it was apparent that the flyer wasn’t intended for my hands even though it was for everyone’s hands.
Should I go or should I stay…dum dum dum dum dum?
We will see….later….closer to that time……
Hey, Sara, feel like making a trip to Alabama in a few weeks? You know, for a seminar on “how to make homework work” even if you don’t actually do it…bahahahaha
October 17th, 2008 at 10:06 am
[Bwahahaha ha!] That’s funny.
If you go, be gracious. You won’t help change things if you go in guns blazing.
…not that I have experience in this area or anything…
~Luke
October 17th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
So you do not do the sight words? Does he know them already and you don’t do them for that reason? That is on testing requirements and can hurt him big time in the long run if he isn’t proficient. This year has been a breeze with sight words so far because we made a game out of it last year at home and Alexis was well into the 1st grade level by mid k year. It can be fun…it’s all about what you make of it.
I am choosing to remain silent on the subject of homework and how you feel about it. End of story.
October 17th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
He hasn’t made anything but 100’s on tests thus far and he has benchmarked for the end of the year on his October 3 testing. I haven’t made a big deal out of this thus far because I know that everyone thinks their kid is/can/was smarter than the next child.
But, Walker is way ahead of his classmates. His teacher is sending him to the reading coach with the first graders who are ahead and there’s one other kindergartener that goes and he is in another class and came from my daycare. I knew he was even further advanced than Walker before we ever closed the daycare.
So, when I say we don’t do the homework, we read, he is reading and I can’t sit down with him and have him do the nonsense words because he knows they are non-sense words (which is the January benchmark) and thus far his teacher agrees that we do not need to be going backwards and saying “p a j” when he can say “paj” or whatever. The only “homework” that we truly do is the handwriting. And, lo, let me tell you, his handwriting is bad and he actually chooses to work on that even when it isn’t an assignment. He has a few books that have places to write the letters that words start with or spell the words and you can do them with erasable markers so he does those a lot when I’m no where around.
So, I didn’t really want to be one of those parents who brags but it is important to remember that Wayne has an IQ over 170 and so I’m sure his genetics are just making for that. Walker knows his multiplication facts through 2 really well (for instance 2 X 10) which is as far as we’ve gone. He was doing some 3’s but he would tell you that 3 x 4 is 12 but when you asked him what 4 x 3 is, he would says, “but you know I don’t know my 4’s”, So, we stopped doing the 3’s as much and just keep doing 2’s.
His teacher says he should be able to recognize the sight words, he can spell them too which most of the kids can spell red and blue because they had songs for those, but he can spell red, blue, pink, purple, brown and green which have been his past sight words.
Trust me when I tell you it isn’t anything I’m doing, this is just his natural genetic talent. But, again, that’s just one more reason why the homework is agitating that I have to sign off on because he has already benchmarked which his teacher says is her motivation for homework in the first place.
So, I sign off on his homework, he will read the little books she sends home the first night she sends them but the other 7 or 8 times, he is not interested, he wants to read the books we have ordered or bought elsewhere. When he and my mom go to the thrift store he comes back with books all the time…..
I don’t know why I feel I have to apologize for his intelligence but it just seems so “that” mother kind of thing to do and I really try not to do that..
October 17th, 2008 at 6:00 pm
You MUST go, are you kidding?!? When you get there, you must ask these questions about homework:
http://www.family-homework-answers.com/support-files/homework-questions-to-ask-the-teacher.pdf
Make a lot of copies because, trust me, every one will want one! You will be doing everybody- including the teacher- a favor.
October 17th, 2008 at 10:45 pm
Yes, go, and ask the questions, and ask for the rational for the homework being sent home, and what research/studies show that homework is beneficial…you’ll help educate all the parents and help change the system. Too many parents assume “teacher knows best” Be polite and gracious, but question authority!
October 18th, 2008 at 12:46 am
Wow! Of course you must go, it was after all for “everyone”. =)
It’ll be interesting to see what they have to say about it all…
October 19th, 2008 at 12:53 pm
I give up reading or further posting here. Obviously your mind is made up on what all you do not like about the school and I just can’t justify trying to share my thoughts any longer.
My whole point on homework is even bright children do need to understand they are not exempt from class or home work. In my M.Ed classes I am taking now we have an entire course devoted to gifted children and the one thing they caution is teaching bright children they do not have to do work becuase they know it already. Frankly, I find that attitude disrespectful to the teacher. We also have done some reading on IQs and IQ testing and IQ numbers do not impress me. There are lots of kids and adults with sky high IQs who never amount to squat because no one drives them to their potential or for various other reasons.
So, from here on out..I am done. Done reading..done commenting. And one last thing..I am one of *those* Mama’s…you know the Muffia moms you made such fun of and I am DAMN proud of it. Wouldn’t have it any other way.
October 19th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
I wish I were going to be in Alabama to attend the workshop
And, I think Holly is wrong. You have been very open minded and thoughtful in trying to figure out what the research has to say about homework and how you’re going to handle all aspects of school.
Holly–do you think you’ve been open minded? When the research doesn’t show a correlation between homework and academic achievement, and when almost all of the work that our kids spend doing every night is meaningless but time consuming, shouldn’t we talk to the teachers/administrators/parents about changing the system? Our children are way more likely to reach their potential and discover their passions if they’re allowed the time to do that.
October 19th, 2008 at 4:00 pm
Before you give up, go read this post and the comments. The comments where I discuss how you are “not reading” because you think I’m trying to sway people one way or another and see what someone else had to say about why they “quit reading” this blog.
I am not doing any one an injustice. I am not being disrespectful to his teacher at all. Disrespect would be sitting down with my son and having him sound out all those non-sense words when he already knows real words and his own teacher said as much. Her exact quote was “no, don’t make him sound out anything he already knows”.
Secondly, we read the 4 page paper books she sends home that have 4 words per page. We just don’ t read them every night for 2 weeks. Why should we? We move on to books he is interested in, even if he has to sound out some of the bigger words, he is learning to use his skills on words and works that on his level.
As for gifted or IQ, I never said he was either. I’m just telling you that his skill level right now is above kindergarten and we are doing what is appropriate for him right now. His skills level could very well level off and it could happen sooner than later. But, I’m doing what’s right for him.
Lastly, you know what a disastrous year I had as a daycare owner. However, there are 8 kids in the kindergarten at this school that came from my daycare and 5 of them are in this advanced reading group with the reading coach. Now, tell me, does that mean regardless of the employee nightmares, we had our goals set in the right direction?
And, we did it without homework, with simply teaching through playing which as a physical education teacher is my natural tendency in the first place.
I’m sorry if you feel like you haven’t been heard here but just as I said in that post I linked you to, those folks feel the same way. It’s time for everyone to quit feeling as if they are being attacked personally and just read and comment according.
October 19th, 2008 at 4:06 pm
Sara, I’d eat my arm if you were in my area during this time. I’m trying to be as open minded as possible, but they will not in any way convince me of their rationale that hours upon hours of homework is necessary.
And, I feel like Holly hasn’t even seen where I haven’t completely agreed with you. You have set it in stone that you are against ALL homework up to a certain age and I’ve not just read your book and then said, “Sara, you are absolutely right, they should never ever have homework”.
I have my own mind. If I were trying to be you, I wouldn’t even be bothering with the homework that is sent home now, but I do, I’ve done most it if it isn’t so ridiculous I could scream. But, I won’t read the same book with four pages and four words per page when my son can read much bigger and more interesting books. I’m still doing the homework, just fitting it to my child.
And, as I said earlier, we do the handwriting homework for more reasons than one. But, one is my husband and I both right like chicken scratch and I hope he can get past that.
With that, I say again, I’m sorry if anyone quits reading because I’m trying to be objective. The comments on the link in the comment to Holly show that I don’t always use the right terminology when it comes to homeschooling and it caused confusing there as well.
Finally, when I wrote the post about my criticisms of Unschooling, I wrote my own thoughts and opinions because those were where I felt my own weaknesses and some took that as me believing that the criticisms were indeed facts.
That wasn’t it at all, that was my opinion and that was were I felt like I couldn’t match up if I were to homeschool.
Everyone has to have an open mind here or we will never learn anything from anyone.